Are You a Permissive Parent or a gentle parent?

🧩 QUESTIONS:

1. When your child gets upset because you said “no” to something…
A. I usually change my mind to avoid the meltdown
B. I feel guilty, but try to stick to it
C. I calmly hold the limit and comfort them
D. I get flustered and don’t really know what to do

2. Your child says, “You’re so mean!” after you say it’s time to turn off the iPad. You…
A. Let them watch 10 more minutes so they’ll calm down
B. Try to explain why, but they don’t really listen
C. Say: “I hear you’re upset, but it’s time now” and hold the boundary
D. Freeze or avoid the conversation

3. When your child makes a mess and doesn’t clean it up…
A. I do it myself—it’s faster and avoids conflict
B. I ask them to help, but they resist
C. I calmly invite them to clean with me or take a break first
D. I threaten consequences, but don’t follow through

4. Your child wants candy before dinner. You say no. They cry. You…
A. Give them the candy
B. Say “just this once”
C. Stick to your limit, even if they’re upset
D. Distract them or ignore it

5. When your child interrupts you for the 5th time in a row…
A. I stop what I’m doing and respond immediately
B. I get annoyed but let it go
C. I acknowledge them but ask for a pause
D. I yell or lose my patience

6. When you try to set a limit…
A. I feel guilty or unsure
B. I explain too much
C. I feel calm and confident
D. I feel anxious and then give up

7. After an argument with your child, you…
A. Apologize even if I didn’t do anything wrong
B. Let it go without really addressing it
C. Repair and reconnect when we’re both calm
D. Avoid it and hope it doesn’t happen again

8. Your child complains that “everyone else can do it!” You…
A. Change your mind to avoid being the “bad” parent
B. Try to negotiate
C. Validate and stick to your decision
D. Feel unsure what the right thing is

 9. When your child doesn’t listen, you…

A. Keep repeating myself
B. Try to bribe them
C. Change tone and connect before asking again
D. Do it myself

10. Do you feel your child respects your boundaries?
A. Not really—they push back a lot
B. Sometimes—it depends on the day
C. Yes—we’re learning together
D. I don’t know—we don’t really talk about boundaries